It all began with a meeting...

Someone once told me that they didn't know why we are all here, but that they believed that things are connected. They thought that we weren't necessarily important in each others lives... but that our purpose was to bring each other together with other lives who needed us. I also believe this is true, and that there comes a time when you have to do what makes you happy, not what everyone else thinks you should do.

Happiness comes in many forms, but I think the easiest way to know you're on the right track is when you feel all warm and fuzzy inside and you have a shit eating grin on your face for no apparent reason. Friends come and go, but only a special few will still call you up to chat when they haven't heard from you in awhile and talk as though you haven't missed a beat of their heart.

Kids. So I think I've more or less recovered from a weekend with the cubs. And I think I've discovered that 5 hours of watching Xena will help me recover from just about anything. I mean so far it seems to be working wonders.

We did a weekend camp up at the old ski lodge, and the weather was great, the kids more or less tried their best to be good and all in all I think the weekend went well.

We did a couple Christmas crafts, went for a hike well let me rephrase that... we went for a drag, played games, made survival kits and built fires in the parking lot. On an official note if anyone from the geek squad asks about the last item, I was dead at the time.

I think the survival kits and the fires in the parking lot were good for all of us. It reminded us that it isn't easy to start a fire, but I know that I can do it, and that there are skills I have that need to be dusted off once in awhile, before they are needed, not when.

I got to teach the kids about tree resin, and where to find it... and do a real life demo of it working to get a fire started when nothing else would. With any luck they will remember that when they need it the most.

The weekend had its ups and downs, mostly ups, but the one thing I'm struggling with is one kid who brings out the immature highschool teen in me. I'm old enough to know better, and yet all I want to do is stick out my tongue, put my thumb on my nose... wiggle my fingers and go "NYAAAAH nyaaahhhh!!!"

I'm not a doctor but it's not normal, and the response he evokes is not normal. I'm sure there is a desgination of some kind, bipoal, schizophrenic, psychotic... but label or not I'm fairly confident he has a behavioural disorder. He can be a super cool, normal 10 year old boy who laughs uncontrollably at fart jokes... and then shortly after be at def con 7 and a half, cussing and swearing and carrying on like a sailor who didn't get laid and woke up with a hangover the morning he has to ship out.

I don't know how this weekend will affect the kids that were there. But I do know this, you can't fix everything. All you can do is try your best, and I know that kids are worth trying for.

It's easy to love those who are most loving. But what about those who need love the most?

I promised a long time ago that I would do my best, so that's what I intend to do...